Domestic Violence Victims Have an Advocate
By Greta Burroughs
Most people do not realize it, but October was Domestic Violence Awareness Month. It coincided with Breast Cancer Awareness so this issue did not get all the attention it deserved, but according to Linda Snelling of the Silent Witness Program, “Domestic violence strikes as many homes as breast cancer.”
On November 21, 1995, Snelling’s youngest daughter, Buffy Marie, was a victim of domestic violence. The twenty-two- year-old young lady was brutally murdered by her boyfriend. He stabbed her 35 times with a knife. Then while Buffy Marie was lying face down on the floor, he continued to torture her by sticking the knife in her back and twisting it.
Buffy Marie was still alive when her boyfriend left her lying on the floor, but the poor girl bled to death from five fatal wounds she had received in the attack. Her grieving mother wanted to understand what happened and why it happened. She wanted to know why her daughter continued a relationship with this abusive person and how it came to such a tragic conclusion. That was the beginning of what Snelling calls, “My journey to find out what happened to my child. One of the tools I learned about was the Silent Witness website,” says Snelling.
“The Silent Witness Program commemorates the victims of domestic violence by creating a life-size silhouette representing the man, woman or child. The front of the silhouette is red and the back is black. A plaque on the front gives the name of the victim and the circumstances of death.”
These silhouettes are placed in areas where they will be seen and the victims of domestic violence will be remembered. The Silent Witness Program wants to make everyone aware of the problem of domestic violence and get the victims the help they need before it is too late.
In 1997, Snelling became involved in the Silent Witness Program and participated in the March to End Silence in Washington DC. Around 3000 people participated from all over the world, and 1500 silhouettes were displayed in the Capital Rotunda. “The purpose of this was to make our leaders aware of the horrors of domestic violence,” according to Snelling. Since then she has been very active in the Silent Witness Program and has started a domestic violence awareness program in our area.
“In 1999, I started a Silent Witness project for Horry and Georgetown counties to bring awareness that domestic violence victims are friends, neighbors, those we grew up with, and attend church with,” states Snelling. “It is never the ones you think. Most of them follow a patterned profile. They go through the same steps in this cycle of abuse.
“First is the honeymoon phase, where life is wonderful and everyone is happy. Then comes the first event, either a push or shove or verbal abuse. Then back to the honeymoon phase where everything is all right again. Another abusive event follows, maybe more severe than the first. That cycle continues until someone stops it, or irreparable damage has been done.”
In 1999, there were six female silhouettes displayed in our county. In October 2006, the number of silhouettes is over 35. Five of which are children, and four are men, including two policemen.
From the six original victims in 1999, more than 15 children were left without parents. As the domestic violence victims increased over the years, so has the number of children affected.
In 2005, Snelling formed a new organization called Not One More, Inc. to study, understand, and find answers for children directly affected by violence in the home. It has been found that domestic violence is a generational issue. Children who are exposed to this when they are young are more likely to carry on the violent behavior when they become adults.
“If domestic violence is a generational issue, then we must change an entire generation. The key is awareness and education. This is one of the goals of this organization.”
Of course, this is not an easy task and help is needed. If you wish to make a tax-deductible contribution to this worthy cause, you can contact Snelling at 248-6236 or 421-0597. You can also get more information on the web at www.notonemore.net.
Domestic violence can strike any household, any income level, or any race. It can take the form of physical violence as well as verbal and emotional abuse. The problem is just as prevalent in small communities, like Loris, as in large cities. South Carolina is ranked sixth in the nation for domestic violence murders.
Domestic violence has been around forever, but unfortunately it has not been given the attention it needs. Through the efforts of Snelling and many others like her, the issue is now being recognized and steps are being taken to remedy the situation.
Snelling concluded our interview with, “We can’t help everyone but for those we can, we want to lead them out of the darkness.”
If you know of anyone in this perilous situation, please get the necessary help to stop the cycle. For further information you can contact Linda Snelling at the telephone numbers listed above.
By Greta Burroughs
Most people do not realize it, but October was Domestic Violence Awareness Month. It coincided with Breast Cancer Awareness so this issue did not get all the attention it deserved, but according to Linda Snelling of the Silent Witness Program, “Domestic violence strikes as many homes as breast cancer.”
On November 21, 1995, Snelling’s youngest daughter, Buffy Marie, was a victim of domestic violence. The twenty-two- year-old young lady was brutally murdered by her boyfriend. He stabbed her 35 times with a knife. Then while Buffy Marie was lying face down on the floor, he continued to torture her by sticking the knife in her back and twisting it.
Buffy Marie was still alive when her boyfriend left her lying on the floor, but the poor girl bled to death from five fatal wounds she had received in the attack. Her grieving mother wanted to understand what happened and why it happened. She wanted to know why her daughter continued a relationship with this abusive person and how it came to such a tragic conclusion. That was the beginning of what Snelling calls, “My journey to find out what happened to my child. One of the tools I learned about was the Silent Witness website,” says Snelling.
“The Silent Witness Program commemorates the victims of domestic violence by creating a life-size silhouette representing the man, woman or child. The front of the silhouette is red and the back is black. A plaque on the front gives the name of the victim and the circumstances of death.”
These silhouettes are placed in areas where they will be seen and the victims of domestic violence will be remembered. The Silent Witness Program wants to make everyone aware of the problem of domestic violence and get the victims the help they need before it is too late.
In 1997, Snelling became involved in the Silent Witness Program and participated in the March to End Silence in Washington DC. Around 3000 people participated from all over the world, and 1500 silhouettes were displayed in the Capital Rotunda. “The purpose of this was to make our leaders aware of the horrors of domestic violence,” according to Snelling. Since then she has been very active in the Silent Witness Program and has started a domestic violence awareness program in our area.
“In 1999, I started a Silent Witness project for Horry and Georgetown counties to bring awareness that domestic violence victims are friends, neighbors, those we grew up with, and attend church with,” states Snelling. “It is never the ones you think. Most of them follow a patterned profile. They go through the same steps in this cycle of abuse.
“First is the honeymoon phase, where life is wonderful and everyone is happy. Then comes the first event, either a push or shove or verbal abuse. Then back to the honeymoon phase where everything is all right again. Another abusive event follows, maybe more severe than the first. That cycle continues until someone stops it, or irreparable damage has been done.”
In 1999, there were six female silhouettes displayed in our county. In October 2006, the number of silhouettes is over 35. Five of which are children, and four are men, including two policemen.
From the six original victims in 1999, more than 15 children were left without parents. As the domestic violence victims increased over the years, so has the number of children affected.
In 2005, Snelling formed a new organization called Not One More, Inc. to study, understand, and find answers for children directly affected by violence in the home. It has been found that domestic violence is a generational issue. Children who are exposed to this when they are young are more likely to carry on the violent behavior when they become adults.
“If domestic violence is a generational issue, then we must change an entire generation. The key is awareness and education. This is one of the goals of this organization.”
Of course, this is not an easy task and help is needed. If you wish to make a tax-deductible contribution to this worthy cause, you can contact Snelling at 248-6236 or 421-0597. You can also get more information on the web at www.notonemore.net.
Domestic violence can strike any household, any income level, or any race. It can take the form of physical violence as well as verbal and emotional abuse. The problem is just as prevalent in small communities, like Loris, as in large cities. South Carolina is ranked sixth in the nation for domestic violence murders.
Domestic violence has been around forever, but unfortunately it has not been given the attention it needs. Through the efforts of Snelling and many others like her, the issue is now being recognized and steps are being taken to remedy the situation.
Snelling concluded our interview with, “We can’t help everyone but for those we can, we want to lead them out of the darkness.”
If you know of anyone in this perilous situation, please get the necessary help to stop the cycle. For further information you can contact Linda Snelling at the telephone numbers listed above.